Opening the Heart

The heart is our direct connection to the divine, connecting our existence in the physical world to our existence in the spiritual world. When the heart is clear and unblocked, we can experience a natural flow of giving and receiving love, empathy, and forgiveness. A full heart is vibrant green and pulses with strong vibrational energy. When it’s blocked, we can become mired in resentment, mistrust, and jealousy. We can feel lonely even if we are surrounded by loving friends and family. If you freely give love but struggle to receive it, this is also indicative of a blocked heart.

You have probably heard of the heart chakra as part of the seven chakras. The word chakra is Sanskrit for "wheel," as they are conceptualized within some Hindu and Buddhist traditions as spinning vortexes of energy concentrated in distinct parts of the body.

Los Cuecueyos de Mesoamerica

What you probably don’t know, however, is that the ancient Toltecs and Mexica of Central America also had a developed system of energetic centers, which, in Nahuatl, are referred to as cuecueyos. The word cuecueyo roughly translates to "shimmering" or "shining," as they were perceived as sources of internal light and energy. (An aside—I love this word because it also reminds me of the Spanish word for firefly, cocuyo—a word that came from the Taíno, not the Nahua, but I still enjoy the similarity.)

For the Tolteca, the heart, or yolotl, served as the center of emotional balance and was the starting point of our spiritual connection and awakening.

When I returned to my spiritual path seven years ago, I started receiving messages from insects while out on my walks. A grasshopper or butterfly would essentially fly into my face and exclaim, "Open your heart! Open your heart!"

For a long time, I was so confused! As a therapist and empathic person, in general, I had always considered myself someone with an open heart. In fact, I thought my heart was often too open, too understanding. Still, this message continued. I took the command seriously and would meditate, envisioning my heart pulsing with green energy, opening and growing. The messages to open my heart persisted, however. What was I doing wrong? What was I missing? I asked myself.

A couple of years after these messages began, I was on a walk listening to a book on shamanism. There was a chapter on the heart, and I suddenly heard, "Opening the heart means seeing clearly." Then, in that moment, I kid you not, a hawk flew right in front of me.

I burst out laughing. My ancestors, clearly frustrated with my consternation, had to figuratively hit me upside the head with the message. And the hawk—a bird that signifies seeing clearly—flew in just to make sure I wouldn’t forget. My guides knew me too well!

Somehow my brain had been on the same wavelength, however, but was processing the message in a different, bottom-up kind of way. As a psychologist, I was often struck by how frequently my clients (and myself, ahem) would use empathy as a defense mechanism. Let me explain: empathy as a defense mechanism means that you use compassion and understanding for others as a way to shut down your own feelings.

Yollotl from the Tarot Yohualli Ehecatl deck: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1066825300/tarot-yohualli-ehecatl-deluxe-hardcover

This works well for those who are scared of loss, rejection, and/or losing a sense of belonging—i.e., "Well, if I can just have compassion for this person who angered, scared, or saddened me, then I'll feel better, and being an understanding person also makes me feel better about myself." It's a smart coping mechanism for dealing with difficult people you love and depend on.

In receiving the message from the book and the hawk, I finally understood the spiritual meaning of opening the heart. Seeing clearly means viewing someone, or a situation, with eyes and heart wide open. It means not pursuing and not withdrawing. Opening the heart requires staying still and observing someone with all of their attributes, flaws, and idiosyncrasies within the larger context in which they exist. If you set aside your ego and view someone fully, you are simply observing—you are not judging, and you are not leaping into narratives and stories about them.

“Contingo” screenprint by Melanie Cervantes: https://justseeds.org/product/contigo/

Based on these observations, you then make a decision from an open heart. This decision could mean that you accept where this person is and what their limitations are, and that you keep them in your life—whether close or afar. This decision, made from acceptance and understanding, could also mean that you lovingly create a boundary—whether that is simply a change in the relationship or no longer interacting with this person.

Opening one's heart doesn't mean that you don't feel your feelings. Feel all of them—get out that anger, resentment, fear, sadness, hurt! You need to feel all of these feelings first so that you can open your heart. When we open our heart, it means that our emotions are valid and can exist alongside others' emotions as well. This is how we create the balanced heart, the open heart, that, in turn, allows us to create a clear line of energy flowing naturally throughout our body. From this balanced heart, we can also clearly see which feelings are ours and which belong to the people around us.

An open heart cannot exist alongside ego. From a Tolteca perspective, it is this difference that can create powerful spiritual activation and connection. Clearly that was part of what my ancestors had been trying to tell me all along. Opening the heart isn't about becoming more loving or feeling more. It's about seeing clearly. And when we can truly see, without illusion, love naturally follows.